Modern Fable

 “I’m sorry,” the SCORPION said as he stung the frog. “You weren’t complying and I was a bad apple who failed to follow departmental use of force guidelines.”

The Complex Relationship Betwixt Birds And Feathers

Elon Musk coming to Justin Roiland’s defense is so utterly predictable that the only reason I was even remotely surprised by it is that I’ve been actively avoiding thinking about shit like this in 2023.

And, since Twitter cut off access to third party clients, I have to get around to Garbage People Drama through days-later articles in my Google News feed like some kind of Luddite animal.

It’ll be  interesting to see if Roiland goes the Chapelle/Louis CK route of embracing his newfound incel dudebro audience, try to mend fences with the Decent Human Being community, or disappear with his money. If I were a betting man, though, I’d lay odds on the first one. 

Comedy Of Errors

Imagine losing out on your dream promotion three times in one day because 20 of your co-workers thought the guy who let college wrestlers be sexually abused would do a way better job than you would.

I mean, I’ve had some bad days, but…

Whatafors

Kevin McCarthy making an increasingly batshit series of deals and concessions with some of the worst, most racist people on the planet in order to gain and maintain largely meaningless power and prestige is such an obvious metaphor for the entire Republican Party that i’m not sure it’s even fair to call it a metaphor. Or a parallel. It’s just a fucking truism at this point.

The fact that this angle is SO obvious and yet not being taken up by any of the coverage of the Speaker vote is further unnecessary proof that the media’s investment in believing / pretending that our systems haven’t been gamed into oblivion and are instead Just Part Of Normal Everyday Operation is nigh-infinite.